Scared to Try a Vibrator in Public?

Scared to Try a Vibrator in Public?

Let’s talk about some thing that can be extremely sexy and hot to some people, and absolutely terrifying and horrible to others.

Public sex toy use. 

indulge in your kinks, but not at the expense of others. "no nude sunbathing" sign.
Indulging in your kink is fine, but not at the expense of others. Make sure it stays private.

Now before anyone gets their panties in a knot, I’m not talking about pulling up a blanket in the middle of Walmart and going to town on yourself with the largest vibrator you can find. Ew.

I’m also not talking about jacking (or jilling) yourself off under a too-small blanket on the airplane while smirking at the guy across the aisle who absolutely knows what you’re up to. This is forcing sex upon other people that have not consented to it and is illegal and totally gross. Don’t go down that path.

I’m talking about discreet solutions to reaching orgasm in places that you have no business having an orgasm in.

This can be done alone, or with a partner and there are so many toys on the market that can help facilitate these forbidden orgasms. There are lusty  stories about women using a vibrator in public and discovering something wickedly sinful about themselves.

If you’re scared to try a public orgasm

For me, the thought of having an orgasm in public was the latter of the above options. Terrifying. My social anxiety just completely waterboarded the formation of any kinky thoughts when it came to actually doing the deed. I guess I wasn’t so concerned with being embarrassed if I was caught but rather I would feel just horrible if someone saw or realized what I was doing. In my mind, that’s about on par with a rapist.

WeVibe Sync. A great tool for orgasms in public
The We-Vibe Sync and I got pretty intimate over a short period of time.

I eventually learned to get over this anxiety enough to calm down and have many many orgasms in public. At the hand of myself, my Sir, and my trusty We-Vibe Sync,  I have cum in restaurants, nightclubs, art galleries, sporting events, and dinner parties. There has never been a time when I’ve thought I was caught or I was worried that I had exposed myself to someone. I realize for some people, the act of others seeing or maybe seeing their genitals or their orgasm is the part that is their kink, but I can’t condone that attitude here because of the legal and ethical implications.

Here’s some steps that Sir and I took to overcome my total paralyzing fear of having orgasms in public. For anyone wondering, I am in a D/s (dominant/submissive) relationship with my male partner, who I refer to as Sir. While we generally don’t practice the lifestyle 24/7 like others, we do manage to incorporate our kink and our roles into the majority of our days.

The key is to work your way up to having a real public orgasm. Start small.

Sir eases me into it

While it’s true that I am the submissive in our D/s relationship and Sir could have just ordered me to go out with him wearing a remote controlled vibrator and forced it upon me, that obviously didn’t happen. Sir was well aware of my anxieties surrounding this “task” and knew that if he tried to force it upon me, I would probably just safe-word to get out of it. It seems like a small thing, but Sir takes a certain amount of pride in pushing me hard but not needing to resort to safe words. That would be him failing to read my needs. I also have to be pushed extremely far to resort to using a safe word that meant “stop immediately.”

So Sir knew that he had to start small to achieve this goal. He actually never explained to me beforehand what his goals were with his project, but after a few weeks, I ended up catching on to what the hopeful outcome of his efforts would be.

Here are a list of instructions that I was given over the course of about a month. Notice that they get progressively riskier over time. I will also mention that daily “cum here at this time wearing this” tasks were relatively common for our relationship. This is why it took a bit of time for me to catch onto his theme. Especially because he would mix it up and include normal tasks like “use your big real dildo in the shower and take a picture.”

My list of “Tasks”

  • Please weed the back flower bed. In a dress. With no panties on (send a picture). Make sure to get dirty.
  • Suntan topless in the backyard (send a picture).
  • Pour a drink, grab a book, and go sit in the backyard for an hour with your We-Vibe inserted. You can turn it on only if you want (send a picture).

    If you're going to orgasm in public, the best places are loud, dimly lit, and busy
    A busy night market is the perfect place to practice wearing your remote vibrator, even if it never gets turned on.
  • Go drive to [45 minutes away] with no panties and a dress on. You are welcome to play with yourself on the drive.
  • Wear your We-Vibe during your morning commute. Turning it on is optional but drive safe please.
  • Take a walk outside for 15 minutes wearing your We-Vibe. No turning it on!
  • Walk to the [grocery store] wearing your We-Vibe. Talk to 2 people at the store. Turn it on for at least a few minutes on your walk back home. No orgasms my dear.
  • We’re going to a movie tonight. Get your We-Vibe ready. It doesn’t get turned on, sorry!
  • At the restaurant: I’d like you to go to the private bathroom and turn on your We-Vibe for a few minutes. No orgasms but enjoy yourself.

I’m sure you can see the pattern here. Eventually, I got so comfortable wearing my We-Vibe everywhere that sometimes I forgot that I had it in! I also began to WANT to turn it on when I wasn’t allowed! I will mention, however, that walking long distances while wearing a vibrator that clamps into your vagina isn’t always the most comfortable thing. Wear tight fitting underwear just in case, always (unless he tells you to go pantyless).

Up Next: I Finally Get to Orgasm In Public with the We-Vibe

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